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Disclaimer: While I did buy a copy of Becoming Us, I also received a free copy in exchange for a review. (Yes, I have 2 copies– one for myself and one to lend out!) All thoughts are my own opinions.
From the time I was young, people and their behaviors fascinated me. What made people tick? Why do people respond the way that they do? So, when I discovered the enneagram, I was intrigued.
But first— What is the Enneagram?
In the simplest explanation, it’s a personality typing based on your own motivation. For those who are new to the enneagram, The Enneagram Institute is a great resource that explains the nine types in great detail. I also like Beth McCord, Suzanne Stabile and Ian Cron’s websites, social medias, and podcasts.
And I have to also add here what the enneagram is not–
- It’s not a stereotyping system. The memes on Instagram are fun, but should never be taken so seriously.
- It’s not your safety net or crutch. Just because you are a certain number doesn’t excuse you from your own personal growth.
- It’s not the gospel. As Beth and Jeff say in Becoming Us, “The enneagram is an insightful tool, but the Gospel is transformation.” The enneagram is a tool. Repeat after me. “The enneagram is a tool.”
What’s My Enneagram?
I am a 9 wing 8. This was a hard one to swallow. When I took a free enneagram assessment on both Ian Cron’s site, I was typed as a “One” which is the perfectionist. I could see it– to a point, but it didn’t feel like me. I found Beth McCord’s site and was typed as a 9, which TOTALLY didn’t sound like me either. I started to dig deeper. I knew which numbers I was not right off the bat– 2,4,5,7,8. That left me with 1,3,6 and 9. The more I realized the 9’s motivation, the more I realized that was me. And I embraced it– the good, the bad, and the ugly. For a while, I typed myself with a 1 wing. But after listening to Suzanne Stabile’s podcast where she talks to her Enneagram 9 wing 8 daughter, I realized that she and I were practically the same person. My 8 wing is VERY strong.
Let me tell you– after I started diving deeper into learning more about the enneagram, I started to really understand myself and my triggers. It was definitely a moment of self-growth and self-reflection. And my mind was blown… it was like peeling back an onion.
Becoming Us: Using the Enneagram to Create a Thriving Gospel-Centered Marriage
When I was accepted in on the Becoming Us book launch team, I was thrilled! I have loved following Beth McCord on Instagram and I have loved diving deeper into the enneagram through a Christian lens. As with all things, I do my best to be very discerning when studying new topics. I can say that when Beth teaches the enneagram, it is not a “prosperity self-help” type of teaching. She teaches the facts and then turns it around to point the viewers/followers/learners back to Christ. This is one of the main reasons why I highly recommend Beth McCord for the newbie enneagram learner.
Becoming Us is the perfect place to start for anyone wanting to learn more about the enneagram and wanting to better their communication style with their spouse. You do not have to be an expert and you don’t have to have any prior knowledge of the enneagram to understand the book. The McCords break down the enneagram for the everyday reader and while it’s simple to understand, the concepts are very enlightening. They bring in personal examples as well as stories from friends relating to enneagram relational topics, like “assumicide” and conflict.
While Becoming Us is very helpful for people who are in relationships, honestly, anyone could pick up this book and read it. The universal tips can be related to just communication and interpersonal relationships in general. You’ll not only have a deeper understanding of yourself, you’ll also walk away with more empathy for other people.
You can buy Becoming Us on Amazon or wherever books are sold.